There is no end and no beginning.  Everyone and everything are the same.  I often wonder about the many people that do in fact experience the same moments, but in slightly different ways, and only because personal experience shapes our existence, and momentary perception are we bound to experience things differently, but it is curious, because I am certain that many people share the exact same things, over and over and over again, and yet, it’s as if it’s really you experiencing  those moments, in different dimensions all at the same time or something… Since there may be an infinite number of possibilities,  then maybe everything that is happening happens to one person, who is every person at the same time, but the slight difference (like the butterfly effect) make things seemingly different when in reality, they are all the same, always.

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And while slipping away from this life louder than most come, you encompass a vague tradition.  With a desperate heart you flounder in life’s beauty, and you disrespect her art.  You simplify her imperfection, and depreciate the negatives to those intricacies you invariably kneel to. The shrapnel that flies recklessly from your lips lodge themselves too deep for your alter ego to recover, or repair.

You’ve lost, in your loneliness, in the frightening emptiness of the mirror; you’ve lost in your head the freedom to forgive, and the memory of acceptance.  She knows the still waters you seek in your guilt soaked solitude, she knows the calming shores you long to tread, so she welcomes you into the presence of beauty, and you shudder at the subtle brilliance of her might. 

I hope I never see
The ocean again
Pushing and pulling at me
As I go deeper and deeper in
Til I’m so far from my shore
So far from what I came here for
I let you surround me
I let you drown me
Out with your din
And then I learned how to swim

I was floating above myself
Watching her do just what you wanted
Poor little friendly ghost
Wondering why her whole house feels haunted
I told myself I was strong enuf
That I had plenty of blood to give
And each elbow cradled a needle
But listless and faint ain’t no way to live

So I hope I never see
The ocean again
Pushing and pulling at me
As I go deeper and deeper in
Til I’m so far from my shore
So far from what I came here for
I let you surround me
I let you drown me
Out with your din
And then I learned how to swim

You keep telling me I’m beautiful
But I feel a little less so each time
Your love is so colorful
It flashes like a neon sign
But I finally drove out where
The sky is dark enough to see stars
And I found I missed no one
Just listening to the swishing of distant cars